Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Jaap is back in town and it's probably a good thing for me. This morning, he woke me up after I had slept in. Damn the changing of the clocks!

Last night, we visited Theresa and her baby, Ilana, and took her dog, Skookum, for a walk. It was nice to hear about motherhood and all that. Come to think of it, I didn't ask about the delivery at all, aside from asking what the C-section actually looks like.

I'd had a bit of a bad day yesterday; when I walked to work in the morning, I was beseiged by negative thoughts. I couldn't seem to help it. I kept telling myself to stop, but they kept sneaking back in...

"What if this happens? I'll be so upset if that happens - how can I prevent it? I'm really uncomfortable with this, what am I going to do about it?"

And so on. All centering on the house, really.

So when Alex called last night, all the fears came out. I'm sure it freaked him out a bit, but you know what? I'm so glad I talked to him. He was calm and reassuring and I feel so much better now.

As he said, no matter what happens, we'll work it out.

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