Thursday, October 14, 2004

Sometimes I wonder if the contractor I work with is just looking for ways to upset me. If not, then it brings up the question: what would he do if he was trying to piss me off?

I've been going through some of my old portfolio of work. I realize that, of late, the best writing that I've done has been extremely personal and not something that I would feel comfortable sharing in a professional setting. I suppose I might want to think about building a more recent professional portfolio.

I think I've said/written that about 20 times over the past two years that I've been running this site. Personal initiatives always seem to get pushed to the side, it seems. It's a labour of love, this thing. And someday - SOMEDAY! - I will spend the time I need to make it what I really want it to be. I will implement my grand vision. However, I might need to be chronically unemployed to find the time to make it happen.

(Who am I kidding? I was the MOST busy when I was "unemployed". It was just a more fun type of busy.)

I'm thinking longingly of my unemployment at this stage. Working 12-hours a day for weeks upon weeks is starting to wear on me. I noticed myself close to tears today as I tried to handle yet another disappointment.

This is not me.
I am a happy girl.
I don't tear up at the drop of a hat (or deadline, as the case may be).
I am NOT cranky. OK, Alex, maybe I'm a bit cranky sometimes. But very very infrequently. Most of the time I'm a bucket of sunshine.


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