Sunday, November 14, 2010

Is this the honeymoon period?

It's funny sometimes when people talk to me wistfully about the "honeymoon period" that I'm apparently going through right now.

I think our WEDDING was the honeymoon period. It was the best and I look back on it and try to internalize that feeling of happiness and already it feels like it is a million years ago and I haven't even gotten the thank-you cards out yet. I think meeting and falling in love was the honeymoon period.

I think being married for us is the married period. Finances and chores and to-do lists dominate because we're on a mission. We're a couple of a certain age. It just doesn't DO to lolly-gag around. Or does it?

I was reminded recently how important it is to stop NOTICING the stuff that annoys you. How important it is to appreciate the person and the things before you. How important it is to be positive and really believe it. To feel grateful for what you have.

It is the human condition to always want more than what they have. To strive for perfection. More efficient, more time, more money, more power, more recognition, more food, more clean, more pretty, more thin, more and better. I am guilty - very guilty - of this condition. Of never being satisfied, or at least struggling to remind myself of my satisfaction.

Am I happier when I'm not pushing myself? Perhaps. But I'm also happy when I accomplish things. So it's a tough cycle to break out of. Except when the accomplishments are not met with a recognition or they're outweighed by the mountain of "more".

So here is my advice for married me: Be in the honeymoon stage. In your relationship, at work, in recreation. Remember to love and enjoy - notice the good. It's what it's all about. It's what I wanted until I had it.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

FYI, much conversation on this going on in Facebook.